Posts tagged ‘lighter’

Basic Zippo Stuff

This started when I was digging around online to see at which point lighter flint circumference became standardized. I obsess over stupid things when I least expect it. Why does every one of these lighters, of every possible configuration, dating back at least to my own 1920’s lighter in my collection, use the thickness flints? I mean, countries can barely co-operate enough to share food, so how did that stupid lighter flint thickness end up being the standard?

Yeah, well, I still haven’t found my answer, but while digging around online, I stumbled across a lot of sites that had weird information about Zippos and similar lighters in general. I gotta throw in my two cents, on some of the most basic points that are bothering me.

gallon jug

I’m pretty sure you can use beer for lighter fluid.

1. I like cheap! I like free even better! But one of the boards I came across were how you could save money buying a gallon of this or that to fuel your Zippo. I have to wonder why the hell you would conceivably buy a gallon of anything just to fill your Zippo? There’s always the zombie apocalypse, but beyond that, geez, if all you want is lighter fluid, friggin’ spend the few extra dollars for something specifically designed for your lighter. You don’t need a gallon.

2. Here’s another thing about a non-butane lighters: it’s fuel is flammable and any ignitable liquids evaporate. Almost all of these types of lighters are NOT airtight. Your Zippo will run out of fluid even if you don’t use it. Those zombies come, you’re f*cked, but until then, just keep a little extra lighter fluid around.

3. Okay, did a Zippo ever stop a bullet? Can it? Not if that’s what you planned on. But I can show you plenty of x-rays of people who survived point-blank gunshots to the face because the bullet didn’t penetrate their skull. C’mon…dumb luck is dumb luck. Better to be lucky than use your ninja skills to throw a Zippo in front of a speeding bullet heading right at you. I was saved in a car wreck by my bowling ball, and I’m not planning on lugging it around for protection from random car wrecks. Also, bowling balls are absolutely useless for lighting a pipe.

bug spray

“Skull means…pirate, right?”

 

 

4. Gasoline? Lamp oil? Aftershave? WTF is wrong with you? Go buy some lighter fluid. God, if I could come through an Internet connection and just slap the shit out of some idiots, I would. Nail polish! Who the…why would nail polish even occur to you? Augh! Yeah, you think I’m kidding…here’s an exact quote from a message board. “could i posssably use nailpollish remover or bug spray” I was going to use a link there, but I refuse to talk to someone who’s considering using Raid in their Zippo.

What makes a Zippo special is that sound and the brand-name. And a lifetime repair or replace warranty. But that sound…you could be anywhere at anytime and if someone flips open and uses a Zippo, you’re never going to mistake that sound for anything else. Unless you’ve been filling your lighter with bug spray.

Really, basic sense here. You’re buying a Zippo because you want a Zippo. If you were in dire straights for just a lighter, you’d go and buy a cheapo disposable lighter.

So in summary;

Don’t buying a gallon of raw naphtha at the hardware store because it’s cheaper than. If you’re that broke, you can’t afford anything you’d need to light with that lighter.

bullet

Generally, a higher mortality rate than cancer.

Don’t immediately think your new Zippo is defective if it runs out of fluid. Unless you’ve used it to protect yourself from bullets.

Don’t go anywhere that your Zippo is your only protection from bullets. If you plan on using it to stop bullets, you need to rethink your life as a whole.

Don’t use anything but lighter fluid. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should. If you’re putting nail polish in your lighter, someone probably had to read this aloud to you.

Now you know why canned peas have more complex instructions than “Heat until hot.”

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Neuropathy Quick Draw Pipe Holster

I have neuropathy and tremors, but we don’t know what’s causing it yet. When I know more, I’ll probably post it at some point.

Because of this, it’s incredibly painful to fold my hands to reach into my pockets and use fine manipulation. Pulling a lighter out of my pocket is literally impossible. Being unable to do simple tasks is frustrating.

Now, I figured out how to move everything to holsters, but when I fall down (which is getting more frequent), I end up either crushing what’s in the holsters, or really hurting myself where I landed on them.

Being annoyingly improvisational, I came up with this goofy pipe holster.

100912 Neuro Pouch 01

I loaded up a pouch with my pipe stuff. The snap hook you see on the back allows the pouch to move away from my body when I fall.

100912 Neuro Pouch 03

So here are the contents of my pipe holster. From left to right, top to bottom: pipe cleaners, backup disposable lighter, pipe (of course), pipe tool, fluid reservoir, lighter attached to belt snap, and the pouch itself.

100912 Neuro Pouch 04

Windcap clipped to chain. I just unclip it when I want to use it. To make the loop through the top of the windcap, I just bent a paperclip into a loop.

100912 Neuro Pouch 05

A pipe cleaner holder from Iwan Ries.

100912 Neuro Pouch 06

Zippo fuel canister. The skull attached to the clip makes it easier for me to pull it out of the holster.

100912 Neuro Pouch 07

Yep. Skull.

100912 Neuro Pouch 08

Zippo model 275. It comes with an elastic lanyard attached. Makes it easily retrievable if I drop it (boing!), and if the lanyard ever breaks, it’s easy to replace with a chain or something.

100912 Neuro Pouch 09

Pipe tool attached to key chain with a ball at the top. I can tuck the tool into the top of the holster, and the ball makes it easier to pull out.

100912 Neuro Pouch 11

I've got my eye on you…

Why yes, that is an eyeball. Torn from a screaming… uh… insert your own enemy here. Eyeball keychain from Tech Optics.

100912 Neuro Pouch 12

Again, eyeball keychain from Tech Optics. For cheap entertainment, put it in someone’s soup.

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BPRD Lighter Is The Gateway To Hell for Hellboy Fans

walyou

The Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense (B.P.R.D) makes its appearance again outside of the Hellboy comics, albeit in an indirect way through the Zippo branded lighter. For those of you in the Stone Age, BPRD is one of the most secretive and celebrated organizations handling ‘out of the ordinary’ occurrences and digging up histories of creatures that don’t exist in a ‘normal’ world. The Zippo BPRD lighter is your entry into this intriguing world, which also put Hellboy at the forefront of ‘evil elimination’.

BPRD Lighter

The Zippo B.P.R.D lighter is made of a curious substance called ‘Black Ice’, which is a form of dark chrome. Carved on it is the logo of the organization. We believe there is no better gratification for a pipe-smoking bloke, trying to emulate the Devil’s Baby, than putting a light to his stub with a flame-creator from hell. Strut around in style, or show it off to your comic-loving buddies by getting one for yourself. It is priced at a competitive $29.99. Not bad for a key to the mystic world of devils and angels, we say!

Full article…

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eBay Faux Pas

So I was bidding on a Scripto lighter (I’ve never had one) and then while looking things up about them, most of the links said Scripto’s used butane. Eek! I just collect wick type lighters.

In my own defense here, yes, I screwed up. I should have researched it more carefully. I’ll own up to that, but I haven’t used eBay since 2001 when I bought one item, and didn’t use eBay before then, or after until the past month.

I asked the bidder, nicely, if I could withdraw the bid because I thought that all Scriptos were butane and he said…

Seller has responded to your question about this item

Dear jacxxxx,You must not know about scripto lightes THIS LIGHTER USES REG LIGHTER FLUID PERIOD!!! NO BUTANE YOU NEED TO LEARN YOUR LIGHTERS i am 51 years old and this LIGHTER USES REG LIGHTER FLUID PERIOD!!! What you SEE ON the BOTTOM of this LIGHTER is a SCREW that screws off to PUT IN REG LIGHTER FLUID I KNOW WHAT I AM SELLING and for you saying that SCRIPTO only sold BUTANE LIGHTERS YOU ARE VERY LOST when it comes to lighters do what you have to do but PLEASE don’t take up MY TIME when you have no idea what your talking about PLEASE!!!! and this LIGHTER HAS A WICK as for LIGHTERS you have a LOT to LEARN I KNOW WHAT I AM SELLING PERIOD!!! I have a HUGE COLLECTION that i am thinning out all of them USE REG LIGHTER FLUID NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BUTANE!!!!! and for your INFO ALL MY LIGHTERS I HAVE UP for AUCTION YOU GOT IT THEY USE REG LIGHTER FLUID!!!!!

– lowxxxx


Uh…okay. I kinda got the feeling that he was red-faced and screaming in my face. “Just buy the lighter from the man as soon as possible, and back away slooooowly.”

Hey out there…just tell me I’m wrong. Switch to decaff.

So, if you sell stuff on eBay and a noob asks you a stupid question, breathe, presume this is a misunderstanding, and reply calmly, even if in the negative. Corrected in this way, I’d probably bid on more stuff this guy had for sale, but I’m afraid to get my ass chewed out again.

Am I wrong?

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Replacing a Zippo Wick

There are basic instructions that comes with a new Zippo and are availble online as to how to replace a Zippo wick. The instructions are clear, but it’s much easier to see how it’s done when someone else is showing you how to do it.

With that in mind, I came across a great video on YouTube showing you just that. Hope you find this helpful!

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